I have two scenarios I would like to
share with you:
Scenario One:
“Johnny, stop antagonizing your
brother!”
In scenario one, what is your very
first thought?
What is your frame of reference; your perspective?
Is Johnny, in your mind, automatically guilty of doing
what he is accused of doing?
Was he, in your mind when you read that
simple statement, antagonizing the brother?
Was he asking for it?
Or maybe in your scenario Johnny was
minding his own business, and the brother, wanting Johnny's
attention, smacked him or pinched him or whacked his glasses off his
nose. Johnny hollered out against the injustice, but caught both
the corrective attention and the flack.
Clearly we have a ruckus going on that
has garnered parental correction.
Two kids, one stimulus (the 'whatever' that sparked the disagreement), two opposing
reactions.
Again: perspective.
Recognize that disagreements innately
have differing perspectives.
The point is not to “die on a
molehill," trying to sell my perspective to you in a disagreement, nor you to me.
If I attempt such foolery, I will
not succeed because the fact is two people cannot wear the exact same pair
of glasses at the same time. In addition, even the slightest differences in the glasses (backgrounds, beliefs, wills, desires, opinions) yield different perspectives. So whatever transpired to spark the
disagreement innately has two different pairs of glasses that prevent ever fully seeing eye to eye.
Regardless of who started the
disagreement, chances are unless Johnny works
to see why his brother did 'whatever,' he will see his brother
as “the cause.” Likewise, the brother, unless he works to see
why Johnny did 'whatever' he did, will see Johnny as “the cause.”
Enter the parent, who hopefully, will
coach BOTH brothers to inspect where they, as individuals,
strayed from the preservation of unity within the family, while not
permitting nor accepting the infamous words of “Yeah, but he made
me do (fill in the blank)!”
None of us are going to
progress towards Christ-likeness (the goal) until we stop the
bickering and the accusations, and listen to our Father, who will no
doubt put HIS finger upon the SIN issues in BOTH offenders who
are train-wrecking Body unity.
No one needs to know the exact details
of the rift between Johnny and his brother to understand both wills
were exalted to an unhealthy level where injustice finally cried out.
And if you are a parent, you know the fact is you will NEVER know
exactly the path that lead to your parental intervention, even if you
ask a thousand questions because Johnny and his brother are both
fallible and fixed in their perspectives.
BUT GOD.
Those two words change everything.....
if we let them.
Scenario Two:
Two dogs are sitting at a glass front
door. One begins to crazy bark. One silently sits. You get up to
see what's going on. A passerby is walking down the sidewalk.
Clearly we have a ruckus going on that
has garnered parental correction.
Two dogs, one stimulus, two different
reactions.
(Oh, let me mention the crazy barker is
eight months old, and the silent observer is twelve years old with
both hearing and sight still fully intact.)
Maturity.
What's going on at the front door is a
revelation concerning maturity. The older dog has learned a few
things in his years. He's learned self-control. He's had his
mind and his body trained to not respond to every stimulus that passes by.
He's learned, by and large, to live and let live. If it isn't coming
at him as a direct threat, he's content to enjoy the world around him
for what it is. He's learned to rest in his master's leadership and
correction. He's an enjoyable soul to be around. He exhibits
safety, smarts, and composure.
Now, everyone loves a puppy. But we
all know puppies must be trained, corrected, and encouraged towards
change, towards maturity. We want them to be housebroken as soon as
possible. We want them to learn to chew on what's theirs and only
what is theirs. And while we correct behavior, what we really are
after is internal composure.
External composure indicates internal
composure, otherwise known as self-control.
Likewise, external mayhem indicates
internal mayhem.
Ever see an untrained adult dog? They
remain like that puppy at the door long after puppy hood departs....
still reacting to every stimulus that passes by. They are unruly on
walks and generally put off an air of being unsafe. You just never
know what you're going to receive from them: a lick or a bite.
We ALL have a responsibility within the
Body of Christ to grow in self control; to NOT be the permanent
“adult” puppy who runs around self-centeredly, crashing into the
world around them, with destructive tendencies, possessing the
ability to lay a hurtin' on anyone who appears to be a threat.
Understanding that no one else is responsible for our individual behavior and sin
choices is the first step towards sanctification in Christ.
Simply put, own your life.
No one, BUT YOU, is responsible for your walk, your choices, your
behavior, your sin, your moods, your internal composure.
Finger-pointing and projecting did not
work in the Garden nor at any other point in history since; it does not work now.
We, individually, are responsible for
our own choices, our own actions, which are anchored in either a pure
heart bent towards God or an evil heart opposing God. Period.
That said, actions do bear
consequences - inescapable consequences - that for the maturing
Christian registers and usually halts unwise action. But for the
eternal puppies, the ones who simply refuse correction towards change
and growth, well, life deals to them degrees of pain, and
unfortunately Body pain – because no sin is confined to a bubble.
Ever see an old dog being harassed by a
puppy? I have. Actually this second scenario is real, from inside my
home currently. When our puppy bounces around, over, and under our
twelve year old dog, the twelve year old, if not in the mood to play,
will find me - puppy actively nipping at his heels all the way to me
- and will give me the hard eye with a nonverbal stare of “Do
something!” He knows me to be alpha. He knows I will intervene.
He is at rest in my leadership.
Disagreements are a part of the human
condition.
Simply put: they are going to happen.
BUT GOD.
Differing perspectives are a part of
the human condition.
Simply put: they are a given.
BUT GOD.
Differing degrees of maturity are a part of the human condition.
Simply put: they are going to exist.
BUT GOD.
When the two individuals, who disagree, having
differing perspectives, BOTH take the disagreement into the presence
of The Alpha, Omega comes. (The End.... of disagreement, disunity,
disharmony, immaturity.)
Understand, in His presence, there is
NO alternative.
He is the embodiment of unity.
He is the embodiment of reconciliation.
We all must ask ourselves:
1) "How important is my perspective?" Worth disunity? Will your behavior garner His correction?
2) "Am I conducting myself in such a manner as to display maturity, regard, and safety; or immaturity, disregard, and harm?" Will your behavior garner His correction?
Ultimately, we are not after behavior modification, but a heart shift; and that ONLY comes from abiding in His presence. Again, He doesn't just promote unity.... He IS unity; he doesn't just promote reconciliation...He IS reconciliation. He IS to be our very personal, very intimate Alpha who is also our very personal, very intimate Omega!
I hope these two scenarios provoke deep
reflection concerning your own walk. Let there be a walk of deep
introspection as you weigh what I have shared here. Ask the Lord for
understanding that extends beyond your own to that of HIS!
Certainly no one is suggesting sin nor
immaturity be glossed over or excused, but we are not to stoop to rants or retaliations. Neither are we to go in the opposite direction of disengaging because we disagree or get offended or don't get our way. These behaviors are childish and are not the marks of a maturing Christian.
No, our responsibility is to keep our
eyes on JESUS, as our Alpha and our Omega, being willing to have our character turned inside out before Him so He can remove spot and blemish, as
OUR part in sanctifying and preserving the unity of the Body.
Keep your eyes on your walk, and if
disagreements arise – which they will – be quick to go into the Throne Room of Grace so your Alpha can also show Himself to
be your Omega!
Godspeed!
